If I am to be honest I'll admit that most of the emotions I'm having are that of fear, anxiety, worry, etc. I tend to worry, in fact as a child my mom would call me a worry wart. I'm always thinking what if? What if I forget something? What if I can't communicate with the Haitians? What if I didn't pre treat my clothes good enough to fight off the mosquitos? What if I only do the work and don't embrace the culture? What if my dollar bills aren't crisp enough?
As I think of all the what ifs I have, I'm reminded of people throughout scripture who also asked the what ifs... Abraham and Sarah, what if we don't have a child? What if we are to old? Moses, what if Pharaoh catches up to us? Noah, what if it doesn't rain? Mary, the mother of Jesus, what if people gossip? What if I'm not prepared? Peter, what if I can't be the rock of the church like Jesus said?
Scripture is full of people like me asking the what ifs.
But there is hope from the scriptures that I am reminded of when these feelings of fear, anxiety, and worry creep up. Over and over scripture tells us, "Do not be afraid," "Do not worry," and my favorite, "Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you." 1 Peter 5:7.
The realities of my what ifs are, yes, I will forget something. Yes, communication will be hard. Yes, my clothes could've used an extra dose of repellant but, I serve a God who cares for me and wants me to leave my anxiety, fear, and worry at the foot of the cross and share the love of Jesus everywhere I go.